Game Preview 5/24/11: I Summon Thee….The Almighty Dan Haren! – Athletics @ Angels

Athletics Logo@Angels Logo

Oakland Athletics  (22-26) @ Los Angeles Angels Anaheim (25-24)

Pitching Probables: OAK – Guillermo Moscoso (0-0, -.– ERA)  LAA – Dan Haren (4-2, 1.84 ERA)

Game Info: 7:05 PM PT; TV – Fox Sports West; Radio – KLAA 830 AM


It took me nearly 5 minutes trying to spell Moscoso’s name up there. That frustrates me greatly, so I shall call upon the wrath of Dan Haren to feast upon the lifeless A’s! This is a big one for the Angels, a win would put a series sweep within arms reach and keep the Pain Train rollin on through Anaheim and into Minnesota. This is too good to pass up for the Angels.



Monkey See Monkey Do: You know who hates Dan Haren’s bad luck as much as me and you? Dan Haren. He hates it so much in fact, now don’t quote me on this, but I heard from a very trustworthy insider that he plans on killing it in a great spectacle tonight at the Big A. Now I can’t exactly predict in what fashion this public execution will take place, but I am positive it will be in grand fashion. Wait, what is this? Hold on, I have an important phone call to take!


(pause while I pretend to go take a phone call or something)



How fascinating! Rumor is that this game tonight is going to rival, if not TOP the 1-hit shutout he pitched against Cleveland at home! How wonderful, I sure am going to have my eyes glued the tv tonight!

Monkey See Monkey Don’t: Do not expect Guillermo Moscoso to stand in the way of Dan Haren’s fury and vengeance! He hasn’t started a single game in the majors, sure he’s had some bullpen experience with Texas, but if it was noteworthy you would have heard of him. Don’t expect to see some sort of David vs Goliath miracle where the young and inexperienced but full of spirit and spunk bests the beast standing in his own home field.

The Monkey’s Bananas Prediction of the Game: Perfect Game.

Nothing is more bananas then predicting a perfect game, and after receiving that phone call I knew what must be said. You will see on this day, May 24 2011, from the hours of 7:05-10:00, the act of Dan Haren throwing a perfect game! No I haven’t gone crazy! Why do you ask?